What is fear?

Fear is not being in control.
It is when you are powerless to change those things around you that make you apprehensive, uncomfortable or sad.
It is very powerful.
Fear can send you careening out of control, before you even have a chance to think through a situation calmly or logically.

Is fear sometimes warranted?
Yes, There is fear of the known.
When we are in danger, it is our fight-or-flight instinct that can sometimes save us. When we are in economic distress, our fear motivates us to work harder and handle our money more wisely. When we know why we are sick, our fear prompts us to take our medicine and listen to doctor’s orders.

But when we fear the unknown, it can become paralyzing – stopping us in our tracks, unable to even breath.
These unknowns can be sounds, sights or even aches and pains – especially the aches and pains. Unknown attacks on our bodies cause us much fear. In the absence of a verified diagnosis, we conjure up countless ailments – most which can cause us more pain and more fear.
Fearing what we don’t even know to be true may seem irrational; but often our bodies do not mesh with our intellect. And in this day of modern technology, access to all things Google can only serve to intensify our already out of control thought patterns.

Often the simplist things from nature is all it takes to remind me who is in control.

Often this type of fear leads to anger.
Anger at the unknown.
Anger at family members.
Anger at God.
Anger because nothing about life is ever fair.

Unfortunately, the anger leads to another emotion – guilt. Although the anger seems warranted, we cannot stop the feelings of guilt any more than we can stop the fear. What we are left with is that overwhelming feeling of despair.

Is there an answer? My faith and intellect says turn to God, read scriptures, pray – but the anger keeps me from it.
I want to scream, rant, cry, ask why, but not even those reactions would do much to alleviate the fear, the anger, the guilt.

So what am I left with?
Do I succumb to the fear? Or do I refuse to allow it to overcome me?
It boils down to trust.
Because of my faith, I have to trust that the God that I have given my life to knows more than I do. And in spite of my anger and my inability to talk to Him right now, I still know within my core that He is in control and ultimately, no matter how afraid or angry I am, there is nothing that I can do or say to change anything.

Fear equals fate; or God’s plan, depending on how you look at it.
Some would call this a crisis of belief; perhaps it is – but I won’t know for sure until the unknown is made known. So, maybe never.

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